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/ q: G" @% Y) r. A5 [9 xWhy did God make mothers?% @/ n! b. A p0 t# A6 H5 {% w
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1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
0 {) H; R8 y+ a2 J4 ^' W6 k- l& Z2. Mostly to clean the house.
) q- x1 }% Y$ P3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.
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( @# i+ V+ p; ^1 yHow did God make mothers? , T* A$ A9 \3 }, z
1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us. @0 K8 T8 N0 S6 l0 T
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring. 2 m+ \& t& B( B
3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts. 3 u. I4 J; U, V( W6 B
6 _' A' K" R0 N8 E! n$ o7 X. p$ }8 PWhat ingredients are mothers made of ? - p, E- s) ~* E. H* }/ v- \5 K
1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
: C2 B1 k" O3 E d+ q% U: m. h2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.
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Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom? - l4 h! h* V% S' R+ H3 z
1. We're related.* Q; D- x# D |2 B7 A
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's moms like me. % r4 c, ?/ z v- M/ {
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What kind of little girl was your mom?
) P1 N$ I) V8 e" b1. My Mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2 X2 i$ W" j/ S2 P3 w; y, S2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
/ Z8 V4 }! g1 R1 l4 Y2 A9 }& Q; ^3. They say she used to be nice. / i& I% @/ a7 X9 L! A- Z+ W
+ c8 w7 I2 ]3 K3 jWhat did mom need to know about dad before she married him?
9 M! Z; z- D. O% B& X5 _, a/ w1. His last name." e5 O" O0 D( S5 ?9 N
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?% i0 ~; d9 B7 f; M
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores? , x1 ]2 k" \! b0 E' n2 V
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Why did your mom marry your dad? ; w" i; \+ u' E
1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my Mom eats a lot.
# A0 A; R' x$ {& A# A n+ y7 I2. She got too old to do anything else with him. ; G- y7 X+ j8 z, i# H
3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.
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) n, N+ l0 p S! hWho's the boss at your house?
* v# }1 \! n4 ?- l3 {1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
; N4 _7 ], G6 `- q, P3 O' ^2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.( Z+ z ]1 w8 Q I* i z8 b
3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.
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2 M" @* \% w8 N3 x0 F7 CWhat's the difference between moms & dads? / F4 q& h. \$ f2 `# V& ]
1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
^* y6 k; c, e3 z2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.% o( G% S. z! F X" i$ W; t! o
3. Dads are taller & stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friend's. . x9 n1 |8 T0 V' I" L4 }+ f' V
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine.
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" x. t+ U: F( j# }! I1 kWhat does your mom do in her spare time?
1 J- [% ?% c5 G+ I- B1. Mothers don't do spare time.
1 U( @) g0 n3 k5 R- z2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long. : H/ c- c( J' N
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What would it take to make your mom perfect?
- Y) W4 ?# C! B: _- e1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
7 ^- ?0 `/ P2 Q* R: A2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.
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If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?
2 h$ b: S! V: t8 A* S7 i1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that. 3 Z: `. R) W9 H: ~
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it and not me.
0 m1 R5 O7 h- Q! ~, w1 l3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.
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